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Thursday, June 9, 2011

17 Easy Steps: Why Fluffer Nutter Frozen Yogurt is Making Me Lose My Mind

I'm currently reading The Omnivore's Dilemma, which reminds me that, at the most basic level, I am a calorie-consuming-and-kinetic-energy-converting machine. Also, my dustiest memories of fifth grade science class tell me that sugar is the most direct route of the calorie-to-kinetic-energy process. This starts me down a dubious logical chain that has been slowly driving me insane over the last few weeks:


  1. If my most basic mission is to consume and convert calories into kinetic energy, then I should be genetically programmed to consume as much sugar as I can (the easiest source of calories).
  2. If I'm genetically programmed to consume as much sugar as I can, then I should constantly crave sweet tasting foods.
  3. If I constantly crave sweet tasting foods, then Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt is the perfect food: it's sweet and delicious, and easily accessible.
  4. If Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt is the perfect food, then I should eat lots of it.
  5. If I eat lots of it, I'm probably eating too much.
  6. If calories consumed exceed calories expended, I get fat (Calories In - Calories Out = Net Calorie Gain).
  7. I'm not a caveman, and don't need to worry about famines anytime soon (and thus, draw upon my stored fat reserves).
  8. If I'm not a caveman, and I eat lots of Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt, then I'll become wildly obese.
  9. Since I don't want to become wildly obese, I need to increase my calories expended.
  10. To increase my calories expended, I need to run.
  11. The more I run, the more Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt I can eat, and the more Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt I eat, the more calories I can convert to kinetic energy.
  12. The more Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt I convert to kinetic energy to run so I can eat more Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt, the more prone I am to injury and over-training.
  13. If I am more prone to injury and over-training, then I will inevitably have to take rest days from running.
  14. If I take rest days from running, then I don't expend enough calories to justify my appetite for Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt.
  15. If I don't expend enough calories to justify my appetite for Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt, I shouldn't eat it.
  16. If I don't eat Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt, then I fail to fulfill my mission as a calorie-consuming machine.
  17. If I fail to fulfill my mission as a calorie-consuming machine, I slowly start losing my mind.
As you can tell, Fat-Free Fluffer-Nutter Frozen-Yogurt is clearly the antecedent to a disastrous spiral of doom and moping about not being able to run enough.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Training Week Recap - June 5, 2011

Week Summary:
72 miles
11 hours
4750' Elevation Gain


Monday - 9 miles, hard effort


Today was a race day - I participated in the 33rd Bolder Boulder 10k, one of the biggest races in the country. How big is this race?

  • There were 54,000 runners
  • Everyone started in waves, beginning with A, AA, AB, B, BA and on, all the way to down to about PD, PE, & PF
  • Wave start times began at 7 AM, and lasted until sometime after 9 AM
  • Age groups where single years, as in I was in the 27 - 27 age group
The race itself wasn't a spectacular effort for me. The course was tough - the elevation was around 5300', and featured several tough hills and a lot of twists and turns. On top of that, I didn't exactly taper, having done a 17 miler 2 days before, and an extra 5 the day before. That said, it was an awesome way to celebrate Memorial Day, and the city of Boulder really came out in full force to celebrate the race.

The finish line in the Colorado University football stadium

Not feeling so hot around the 8k mark

Approaching the finish. Still feeling like pooh.

Tuesday - 5.4 miles, 1540' Elevation Gain



Having done a fair amount of hard-pounding running on concrete the day before, I decided this would be a good day to head up to the trails in the mountains. I got a good climbing workout on the Mesa Trail around Bear Peak.

Wednesday - 21.2 miles


I needed to start getting some good slow distance work in, so I went long today even though I had done a 17 miler just 4 days prior. I headed out to the Boulder Reservoir, and looped my way around there for 3 hours, of which I did about 6 miles with my sister and one of her friends. Good, long day.



Thursday - 3.75 miles + Cross-Training


Having gone long yesterday on already fatigued legs, I didn't feel up to much today; but I still tried to get a good morning of work in anyways. I slept in, then did 30 minutes easy on a paved path along one of the creeks in town, then hopped in the pool for 30 minutes of water running, which wiped me out much more than the running did.

If you haven't done water running, it's a kick in the ass. The activity is exactly what it sounds like - an upright running motion in water (without touching the floor of the pool). Not only are you constantly pumping your feet and arms just to stay afloat, but you are getting a tremendous amount of resistance from the water. It's also low-impact, which makes it ideal for rehab or cross-training. Give it a try next time you want a fast, hard workout.


Friday - 10.33 miles, 1230' Elevation Gain


I headed up early for a run on Bear Peak. This was another good climbing session on a technical trail, but I also was fortunate enough to have my phone on me, which allowed me to grab a few pictures. I got 6 miles in on the trail during this morning run. Later, I went back out for 4 easy miles on one of the paved paths in town to grab some extra miles.
Bear Peak from the parking lot



I saw this guy on the trail, not 10 feet away from me after I turned a corner

I believe this is Green Mountain, which is adjacent to Bear Peak

Looking back down on an uphill portion of the Mesa Trail

Just a cool tree along the path

One of the few exposed portions of trail above a canyon

Another section of trail along the side of Green Mountain

A look down the side of Green Mountain


Saturday - 11.5 miles w/ interval work

Had a workout with the Running Republic of Boulder. I ran from my apartment to the meeting place for the group (about a 2.4 mile warm-up), then did the interval workout: 6 mins, 4x2 mins, 6 mins, all at about 10k to Half-Marathon pace. This took a lot of effort, and was with a really fast group, which forced me to push it hard. Afterwards, I ran back home to tack on a few extra miles, making for a solid morning of work. The pancake feast afterwards with my brother-in-law and nephew was extra motivation.

Sunday - 11.3 miles, 1100' Elevation Gain

This was probably the toughest workout I've had yet in Boulder. I met up with a group of about a dozen other runners in town, and we all piled into 3 cars to venture into the mountains. After 20 minutes of winding through canyons and narrow roads, we parked in what seemed like a remote intersection of 2 dirt roads, deep in a canyon created by about 4 different mountain ridges. From there, we took off on a dirt road (perhaps ironically) called Wall St., that ran parallel to creek that cut through a deep and heavily wooded canyon. The road started at a 5% uphill grade, and barely deviated from that pitch the entire run - which was 5.5 miles. 5.5 miles, all uphill, and we started at about 6600' of elevation.

I was totally unprepared for this. First, I didn't know how long the run would be. Second, I had no comprehension of how much climbing was involved. Third, I didn't carry any water with me for the first two reasons. The group I was with were solid altitude runners and climbers, so they motored their way uphill. I tried to stick with them, but after 2 miles, fell into a walk/run routine to try and make it to the summit. After 5.5 miles of running 1100' uphill, I reached the turnaround. That was when the fun finally began, because for every suffocating foot of climbing I did, I had a foot of downhill that I could bomb. The instant I turned around, I went from being restrained by how well my lungs could supply air to my muscles to being held back by only how quickly I could turn over my feet on a rockin' downhill. If I did about a 9:30 to 10:00 pace going up, I was going sub-7:15 on the down. For as much agony as I had in the first half, I had equal amounts of excitement on the way down.

THIS was the exact kind of workout and trail I need to do more to get ready for my ultra. I can't wait to make it back into these canyons for some tough climbing at elevation.

Lastly, perhaps the highlight of the morning, despite the awesome run and beautiful canyon, came on the drive back in to town. The road we were on ran parallel to the Boulder creek path, and running towards the canyons (opposite our direction), I spotted Tony Krupicka - perhaps my favorite ultra runner right now! He was likely on one of his epic 30 mile training runs (the guy logs about 140 to 170 miles a week here in Boulder). Anyways, with his signature long hair, beard, and shirtless attire, I'm 100% confident it was him. I felt like a 'tween girl who saw Robert Pattinson drinking a Bloody Mary.